Lover's Guilt

by Amythest Loring Lee (2020)

             Lexi paced the room. “Where is he?”, she whispered to herself. Her brown eyes glanced up at the clock. The second’s hand ticked away. Her boyfriend was 3 hours late. Lexi bit at her nails, pacing back and forth. Something felt off. 

“He’s not coming,” the wood floor creaked beneath her. Lexi stopped. She looked around.

“Why would he?” the beige walls groaned to each other and wind picked up outside. It’s just the blizzard outside, she thought.

 “I’m hearing things,” the brunette girl sighed. She glanced at her front window seeing the snow whip by. The wind howled and the sky darkened. Lexi frowned, sitting down on the couch.

“You don’t care about him,” The couch bit. Lexi jumped in surprise. The dying flowers nodded in agreement.

“I-I do!” Lexi argued. The old green couch gave a sarcastic hum. The books snickered on their shelves. Lexi moved to the shelf, ripping the books from their homes.

“Stop!” Lexi cried, “I.. I love Mark.” She looked around at the furniture. Trying to convince them and maybe herself.

The furniture laughed at her. “More lies,” the walls spat at her, “Selfish girl.” Lexi picked up the vase of dead flowers, throwing it at the wall with a growl. A knock rattled the door.

“Mark!” Lexi lunged for the door, hoping for the madness to stop. She opened the door to find the blizzard raging on and her tree out front.

“Sweet girl, give up on his man there are new doors for you out there!” the door laughed slamming in Lexi’s face.

The couch huffed. Lexi, feeling faint, was heading for the chair. The chair was neutral in the argument and only wanted to sit and listen. “Stupid girl! Face the consequences of your actions,” the couch commanded. 

“What actions?” Lexi growled. She tripped before an answer could be heard. Falling on the carpet, she caught herself with her hands. Her right hand landed in something slippery. She pulled her hand to her face and screamed. Blood covered her hand. 

“Your actions,” the couch repeated. The room held its breath as Lexi continued to scream.

“No!” the girl denied, “He’s not gone!” She stood on weak legs, bracing herself with her hands. 

Blood smeared on the walls. “Gross!” the walls cried. Lexi ignored them as hot tears blurred her vision. She tripped again, landing on the floor. Blood marked the floor and couch as she made her way to the door.

“You idiotic girl!”

“Another mess?!” 

The room erupted in chaos as the furniture voiced their complaints. Lexi ignored them as her fantasy began to break into reality.

“Lexi!” a whisper floated through the window.

“Mark!” Lexi cried.

“Ew!” the door exclaimed as Lexi opened it.
“I’m so sorry Mark!” 

“Lexi,” the whisper echoed again.

“Mark! I love you,” the cold girl begged as she moved outside. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” She stood under the tree, who had now gone silent. The direction of the voice wasn’t distinct enough for Lexi to follow. “Mark?” she called again.

“Lexi,” the voice spoke again to her left.

“My love,” it called far to her right.

Lexi looked around, seeing no one, but feeling his presence. The frozen girl sobbed and feared consequences for what she had done. 

“Please, Mark,” she pleaded with the cold air. She stands, seeing footprints in the snow. Lexi began to follow them towards the woods. Her socks were soaked and her feet were numb. Her sweater and leggings were covered in snow. “Mark? Come back!” the freezing girl called. Another painful step closer to dark trees. With her next step, she tripped and fell just short of a piece of wood sticking out of the ground. Curiosity pulled her arm up to wipe away the snow and ice. ‘TRAMP’ was scrawled in blood down the board. Guilt began to bubble in the delusional woman’s stomach. She felt a tug on her leg. Looking down, Lexi screamed in horror as a hand emerged from the ground. “Let go!” she screamed, trying to pull her leg away. This only caused the hand to hold tighter. Lexi kicked at the arm, hoping for freedom. A head of long, blond hair grew from the ground along with another dirty arm. The woman turned her head to look at Lexi. Her eyes were bloodshot and her head was lop-sided. She looked as if she had been buried there for months.

“Monster,” the blonde woman croaked from the ground. Lexi looked on with dread as the woman continued to rise into view. “Do you remember me?” The dead woman croaked again. 

“No, please,” Lexi begged as she shook her head. 

“I’m Anna,” the half-buried female growled, “Remember now?”

“Please let me go!” Lexi pleaded as nails dug into her leg and back, pinned to the ground. Lexi’s foot made contact with the head, causing the thing to let go of her. She ran. Her cold feet slipping and tripping over themselves as she scrambled away. The terror-stricken woman headed for the trees, refusing to look back at the woman in the frozen dirt. As soon as she was in the cover of trees, Lexi hid. The girl shook as memories flooded her head. Memories that she wished to block out again…

***

Lexi had pleaded with the tall man with bright blue eyes for an hour as he packed up his things. “Please Mark!” she shouted, hoping he would listen. 

“I’m sorry,” he bit back, “I can’t do this anymore

“What? I’m just supposed to forget that I love you?”

“I don’t know. Do whatever helps you get through it,” the man sighed for the umpteenth time.

“You’re not being fair,” Lexi cried deliriously. She snatched Mark’s shirt stopping him from leaving when he picked up his bag. 

“No, Lex, you’re not being fair,” Mark frowned, combing his hand through his black hair, “I’m just not happy in this situation. It’s over.”

“Liar!” Lexi screamed, pushing Mark away, “You’re happy with me. You love me.”

“I’m sorry,” the man whispered, finally leaving. The door shut in Lexi’s face leaving her alone.

Lexi locked herself away in her home for months, only venturing out for essentials. Every man that slightly resembled him was Mark. She drove herself crazy looking for the man. She finally found him 4 months later on a date with a beautiful blonde named Anna. Lexi was heartbroken, furious, and jealous. Jealousy whispered plans to get him back. Jealousy tempted Lexi and she gave in. No one could have Mark, but her...

Now Lexi’s sins have caught up with her as a once-bludgeoned-to-death Anna was now walking amongst the blizzard. Lexi cried and prayed for mercy. Her prayers were unanswered as Anna moved through the trees. 

“Found you,” Anna sang behind her. Lexi screamed as Anna grabbed her hair, dragging her deeper into the woods. The girl struggled from the ground, trying to find a way out of Death’s grip. This only angered her captor who threw her down. Lexi tried to crawl away from the undead girl. Tears blurred her vision, but she could feel the cold, rotten hands wrap around her neck.

“S-sorry,” Lexi choked out.

“Liar,” Anna roared. 

Lexi tried to feel around for something to save her. Her blurry vision was darkening just as her right hand brushed against a large, frozen branch. She swung, knocking Anna down. The branch continued to come down on Anna’s head. Decaying brains and old blood splattered in the snow. Lexi screamed and cried as she decimated Anna once again. Flashes of the past mixed with the present as the events ended similarly. Anna’s dead body is Lexi’s living room flashed in her head. The rush of beating the girl ran through her veins. Lexi could hear Anna’s pleas for help again. Lexi could see Anna’s limp body on her carpet, spilling blood. She remembered how heavy the dead was and how lucky she was to live without neighbors. She remembered wondering why Anna couldn’t get it through her head that Mark was hers.

Now numb, emotionally and physically, a blood-covered Lexi staggered more into the woods calling for Mark. She wandered to the lake, where she and Mark had their last date. “Mark?” she called out.

“Murderer,” Mark growled behind her. Lexi gasped turning around to nothing. “Over here,” he whispered behind her again. Lexi turned and ran in the direction of his voice. His form became more visible the more through the blizzard Lexi pushed.

“Mark, please forgive me,” Lexi begged when she reached him. 

“Forgive you?” Mark scoffed. He leaned down to Lexi’s level. “Why would I forgive you?” he spat. 

“I love you.”

“You love yourself,” the ghost countered. He pushed Lexi back. Anger boiled through him. “You couldn’t let go! You were jealous of what? The fact that I was happy without you? That I moved on? You killed Anna! You beat her to death!”

“I was in a bad place,” Lexi defended. Mark pushed her harder, knocking her to the ground. “Mark! Please.”

“You’re sick. A monster,” he growled over her. He grabbed her head, smashing it into the ground. With each bash, Lexi recalled the rest of her actions 6 months ago. She saw Mark’s horror-filled face. She saw His fear. Mark didn’t like her gift. He didn’t like her ‘art’.

Bash.

Mark tried to run. He knew his fate.

Bash.

Lexi stabbed him. Her anger pushed her but envy guided her hand. If she couldn’t have him, No one could. She bathed in his blood.

Crack.

Lexi’s heart jumped as she realized she was over the frozen lake. Suddenly, Mark was gone. A scream grabbed Lexi’s attention as a mutilated Anna charged to her. She swung the brain-covered branch down. Lexi dodged the attack. Another crack sounded out as Anna hit the ice. Lexi’s head throbbed as she tried to keep conscious and get away. Anna’s weapon continued to make contact with the ice, missing her target. Cracks splintered in the ice below Lexi. “You deserve this,” Mark called out from the snow. 

“Help me!” Lexi exclaimed, still crawling from Anna.

“This is what happens to envious people,” Mark informed. Lexi could feel his smirk.

“I’m sorry Mark,” Lexi repeated once again.

“I’m sorry Mark,” Anna mocked, “You’re pathetic!” The branch made contact with Lexi’s leg. She screamed out. Mark walked into view. 

“Welcome to Hell,” he growled, kicking Lexi in the head. Her ears rang and she saw stars as she rolled from the impact. Mark’s foot met her ribs, knocking the air out of her. The ground splintered more before opening up below the beaten girl. Lexi dropped into the freezing water. The water stung her already numb skin. Her body was tired. She didn’t try to reach the surface. Guilt had eaten away at her mind. She wanted it all to be over. She watched bubbles leave her mouth and nose and rise to the top without her. Not even her air wanted to stick around. Her muscles seized, missing the air from her last breath. She fell into the dark as the pain was quickly replaced with coldness. 

Lexi was dead. Killed by guilt and grief, she was given a fitting punishment. Her ghosts found peace in her pain.